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Work Problems Can Be Serious Business
So often, the conflicts, problems and worries which occur in the workplace permeate our lives. They can affect self esteem, family life, the ability to function on the job or the ability to see the future. We can become negative, frustrated, stuck, or even downright destructive to ourselves, colleagues, family or friends.
While few of us experience the extreme emotion that has caused postal workers to shoot up their workplaces, certainly many of us have felt extreme stress about issues related to work. Most of us spend many, many hours at work every week. That time should hold some meaning or reward, as it affects who we are and how we feel, even when we’re not there.
In talking with our clients about work issues, we have come to believe that many of the problems can be related to power and fairness. People want to be treated fairly, with respect. They want to feel that they are listened to and valued, that they are included as a member of the group, and that their job is a good fit for their sense of who they are. When these conditions do not exist, the result can be stress, anxiety, depression, alcohol abuse, gambling, financial and/or marital conflict, feelings of inadequacy or impotence, irritability, anger and even rage.
We help people who cannot resolve conflicts between themselves and others in the workplace. We help clients explore the dynamic of the conflict to understand what’s involved. Communications, conflict resolution and negotiation all are skills which can be employed effectively with practice. We can help clients discover and hone those skills in a safe place.
People may find themselves in conflict about the job they do. Their interests may be changing or have changed. The industry or company for which they work may have changed. Or their particular personality may not fit the requirements of the job.
Sometimes issues at work may stem from past relationships or personal or family issues. In those cases, we are able to relate what may be happening at work to other patterns or relationships. In this way we help the client find solutions by examining the larger picture, not just the isolated work situation.
In the comedy film Analyze This, the principal character was suffering a business problem. He was no longer able to carry out the requirements of his job as a mob boss. He had panic attacks and crying jags. He suffered impotence. He could no longer make critical decisions. (Not a good thing in his particular line of work.) His relationship with his therapist allowed him to discover issues in his past which finally helped him realize that he really hated what he did. He needed a change. It gave him a new lease on life (literally)!
Several other work problems have come up in discussion with clients. Women express conflict about their multiple roles as worker, wife, mother, daughter. They may be dealing with sexual harassment or may be romantically attracted or involved with a co-worker. Some women feel a lack of respect in the workplace. They may not be recognized for their contributions and/or not included in decision-making.
We see people who feel betrayed. They are downsized and outplaced. Office drama can resemble Shake-spearean intrigue. Questions of trust, honesty and competition arise. Some people are dealing with their own aggressiveness or competitiveness. People suffer being lied to, bullied and belittled and want help with their feelings and their circumstances.
In family businesses, we encounter boundary issues, and individuals being treated in their family role within the business. Issues of respect and individual boundaries may need to be worked on as much, if
not more, in a family business.
When people are dealing with workplace problems, we offer a place where people can hear themselves. We can offer a sounding board for clients, to allow them to process what they are struggling with at work.
If they can hear their own voice, they have the potential to better understand their work issues and the choices available for resolution
and change.
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